Movie Night
by Capt. Cow
Summary: crackfic! The outlaws spend their movie night watching a film that confuses them slightly...Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves.


**Movie Night**

**Disclaimer: I don't own them. Sigh. **

**Authors Note: Somewhat of a crackfic…more ridiculous than anything I have even attempted before…this was inspired by several late nights in a row and a viewing of Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves. This will make even less sense than it already does if you haven't seen that film. It's quite good, go watch it than read this fic…**

**Have you seen it yet?**

**Ok. Proceed. **

**P.S Of course the outlaws do not have VCR's in the 12****th**** century. If you write me a review telling me this fact I will hit you. Please, just enjoy the insanity, don't try and make it make sense. **

"I'm back!!" Much called as he made his way back into the camp. The others breathed a relieved sigh, he had been gone far too long, and they had been starting to get worried. Though each of them took a turn at choosing the movie for their monthly "boys only" movie nights none of them usually took this long to ride to the video shop in Nottingham and return with their selection.

"Did you remember the popcorn?" Allan called, as he rolled himself of his bed and hurried to claim a good spot in front of the television. Being outlaws they hadn't been able to afford a top of the line plasma tv, and so it was important to find a good spot in front of it, otherwise your viewing could be severely compromised. Will insisted that this was why he hadn't enjoyed 300, but Allan disagreed, suggesting that his hiding behind the couch in the scary bits had probably attributed to his dislike more than the fact that he hadn't had a good seat to start with.

"Of course I remembered the popcorn" Much huffed, placing down the shopping bags he was carrying. "I seem to recall that you are the only one who has ever forgotten to get popcorn, so I don't think you should be questioning me on it!"

"What movie did you get?" Will called, leaping onto the couch next to Allan before Robin could come and take a good seat. "I hope it isn't Transformers again! I'm getting so sick of that film!"

Much looked at his feet for a moment, which gave the rest of the assembled men, well all but Robin who was looking slightly stunned after John hit him with his stick in order to beat him to the comfy chair, a slight feeling of nervousness. They had all agreed that each should get to choose a movie once a month, when Djaq and Marian went off for secret women's business and left them all alone, but Much's last choice (Eragon) had made them question whether he was really up to picking movies.

"Well?" boomed John, trying to look innocent and Robin recovered from his head injury, "what is it?"

Much produced the movie from the bag with a flourish. "It's called Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves! It's a movie about us! I'm really looking forward to watching it!"

The rest of the gang exchanged startled glances.

By the time the movie had run for 20 minutes Allan was laughing so hard that he could hardly breathe. Every time he seemed to recover enough to eat something else would happen to set him off, Will had to keep pounding him on the back so he didn't choke on the low-fat popcorn Much had brought.

"But Robin, look at your hair!" he kept giggling, pointing at Kevin Costner on the screen. "Your hair!!"

John too was having trouble taking the film seriously. "I just don't understand why you're an American! You keep saying you're English, so why wouldn't you be trying to disguise your accent?"

Robin, who was clearly somewhat affronted by the film's portrayal of him (he had been particularly disturbed seeing himself in a crusade prison camp, apparently that was not the heroic way he had wanted himself portrayed on the screen) had not found all the sniggering going on amusing, and kept shooting glares at Much as though it was his fault Kevin Costner refused to speak in an English accent.

Much, who was wrapped up in the film, didn't notice.

Will too was apparently enjoying it, he kept defending the acting, and although he had hidden his face behind his hands when Robin's father was killed, was being very brave through all the rest of the scary scenes.

Another 20 minutes later on Robin was getting more and more disgruntled. Marian's hair had caused even further amusement for Allan, who had actually squirted mead out his nose when she first revealed herself.

"I think it's a good thing you didn't pick this movie for one of the nights the girls come to Much, Marian would have killed you! She looks nothing like that woman! And she certainly dresses much better!"

"Wish I hadn't been here to watch it" Robin muttered sullenly, still smarting from the fact that Little John had come close to defeating him in their fight.

"Yeah, but if you weren't here you'd be at the girls night, and all they do there is talk about how hot Gisbourne is with his shirt off" Will had put in, still amazed by the fact that the man playing him was American, blonde, and apparently extremely angry at Robin. Allan, who was slightly distressed by the fact he hadn't appeared yet, had begun suggesting that maybe they named the characters wrong, after all Will was much closer to the boy who was Little John's son.

None of them quite knew how to take the portrayal of the Sheriff of Nottingham, who didn't seem nearly old enough to any of them, and who was also even more crazy than their own.

Robin had finally started enjoying the film more than half way through, when his character had put himself in charge of the outlaws, and Guy of Gisbourne had been killed by the sheriff. (That scene had merited a rewinding, even though Much had complained, saying it ruined the integrity of the film). Will hadn't been able to watch, but had cheered along with the rest.

John, whose character sported matching facial hair to him, was extremely pleased with the whole business, after all in the movie he had a wife who loved him, eight children, and spoke more than token lines than could be episode titles. (He had half a mind to start modelling himself on the man on the screen, after all, he hadn't said "We are all Robin Hood" once, and yet still seemed to be able to be a functioning member of the gang).

Allan, after coming to terms with the fact that the film had no Allan A Dale (he would have been angry, but there was no Much either, unless you counted the loyal blind guy, and Djaq had been turned into a tall angry man repaying a debt) had continued to get the giggles, particularly when the Sheriff announced his intentions to marry Marion (the rest of the gang had shuddered at this thought, which really was too disgusting to bear).

Will, unable to understand why he would randomly be Robin's brother, and a little bothered by the fact that his namesake had been tortured, was still very much enjoying the film, and had taken to humming the love song in the scary parts. The rest of them were going to have Bryan Adams stuck in their heads for days.

Much, riveted by the movie, had pretty much ignored the rest of them with their jibes and their slight annoyance, and so had enjoyed the culmination of the story as much as anyone, though he was unable to understand why at the end King Richard had come straight to their wedding, instead of informing people he was home from the crusades first.

And so it was, when Marian and Djaq returned from their girls night, thoughts of a shirtless Gisbourne keeping both entertained, they were somewhat confused by the drunken, but happy chorus, of "Everything I Do, I Do it for You" that the men of the gang were singing.

**The end. Glad I could share my random tiredness with the rest of you. Bit of a change from my usual need for angst, which is nice I think, although I definitely write that better…**


End file.
